The best science jokes to make you laugh, groan, and Google
Crafting a perfect joke takes skill, timing, nuance, and a sophisticated understanding of your audience. The following list of science-based knee slappers has almost one of those. We gathered up some of the most groan-inducing scientific jokes we’ve heard from peers, remember from childhood, or made up while we were supposed to be partaking in serious journalism. So, when the family gathering turns to a tense topic this holiday season, tell one of these room-clearing jokes to lighten the mood.
Have a favorite science joke that’s not on the list? Tweet it with the hashtag #PopSciJokes for a chance to get it on the list.
What did one beam of light say to the other just before they slammed into each other? “Dude, you can totally crash on my photon.”
An amoeba sits down to eat at a restaurant. Across the room, another Amoeba is undergoing mitosis. The first amoeba flags down the waiter and says, “I’ll have what she’s halving.”
Want to hear a joke about potassium? K.
Two chemists walk into a bar.
The first one says, “I’ll have some H2O.”
The second says, “I’ll have some water too. But why’d you order it like that? We aren’t at work.”
The first chemist excuses himself and weeps in the bathroom.
His assassination plot had failed.
A photon checks into a hotel, and the desk clerk says "Can I get a bellhop for your bags?" Photon responds "No need. I'm traveling light."
Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana.
Why can’t you trust atoms?
They make up everything.
All mushrooms are edible. Some are only edible once.
Why can’t you argue with Pi?
It’s irrational.
There are 10 kinds of people: Those who understand binary and those who don’t.
I was reading a book on helium.
I couldn’t put it down.
There are only bad science jokes left. All the good ones argon.
What did the stamen say to the pistil?
I like your style!
What did the microbiology student get for being late to class?
A tardigrade.
How much room do fungi need to grow?
As mushroom as possible.
Does anyone have any jokes about Sodium?
Na.
If you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the precipitate
Why do chemists love dubstep music?
They love to drop the base.
A butterfly gets pulled over by the cops for speeding. He hands the cop his driver’s license with a photo of a caterpillar on it. “Sorry, it’s an old picture.”
What do you call it when a geologist has to work on a Friday night?
Gin and tectonics
Written by PopSci Staff for Popular Science and legally licensed through the Matcha publisher network. Please direct all licensing questions to legal@getmatcha.com.
Laura Benson
Imagine becoming vastly wealthy overnight. Being a winner of a multi-million-dollar lottery is certainly a life-changing event for almost every single lottery winner. My name is Laura Benson from Chicopee, Massachusetts, the famous PowerBall lottery winner of $758 million (£591m) in 2017. I know many people would wonder how I had won the lottery. Would you believe me if I told you that I did it with spell casting? I met this famous spell caster known as Dr Isa, and he was the one who did it for me. As shocking as it was to me, I also want to encourage all those who need help to try their luck with Dr. Isa, who helped me win the lottery. I believe you’re still going to win with his help, too, just like he did for me. WhatsApp: +2347046030096 Email: drisaspellcaster@gmail.com Website: https://drisaspellcaster.wixsite.com/dr-isa
Buy2cbonline.com shop
Buy2cbonline.com – @Buy2cbonline.com/shop/ | your #1 source for top quality premium RC’s research chemicals like 2cb powder 2fdck (2-FDCK) 3cmc crystal meth 4mmc eutylone mephedrone ketamine Ephedrine hcl powder A-pvp etizolam bromazolam alprazolam powder Mdphp freebase Coke and more.
Buy Crystal Meth online | Order Crystal Meth online | Crystal Meth price per gram Meth Shop | Buy Cheap Crystal Meth online AUS Canada USA Europe, can I buy crystal meth online? https://buy2cbonline.com/product/buy-crystal-meth-online/
Order Monkey Dust online Mdphp | Order Mdphp Freebase online Monkey Dust Mdphp freebase for sale https://buy2cbonline.com/product/order-monkey-dust-online-mdphp/
Buy Ketamine online | Order Ketamine online Australia | ketamine Price per gram https://buy2cbonline.com/product/buy-ketamine-online/
Buy 5f-mdmb-2201 online – https://buy2cbonline.com/product/5f-mdmb-2201-for-sale-online/
Buy JWH-018 online | Order JWH-018 online | JWH-018 Price per gram – https://buy2cbonline.com/product/buy-jwh-018-online/
Buy Fish Scale cocaine online Buy Cocaine online AUS | Order Cocaine online | Fish Scale Cocaine https://buy2cbonline.com/product/buy-fish-scale-cocaine-online-fast/
Buy 2FDCK online? 2-fdck for sale 2fdck buy usa canada Australia uk | 2fdck for sale Buy 2fdck online | Order 2fdck online AUS canada UK | 2fdck shop 2fdck for sale | buy 2fdck usa buy 2fdck usa https://buy2cbonline.com/product/2-fdck-for-sale/
Buy Ephedrine hcl online | Order Ephedrine hcl online AUS Ephedrine hcl price Ephedrine shop
https://buy2cbonline.com/product/buy-ephedrine-online-hcl-powder/
Buy Alpha-pvp online | Order Apvp online | Apvp Price per gram AUS canada USA | Apvp price per kg in Australia https://buy2cbonline.com/product/buy-a-pvp-online-usa/
Buy Clonazolam online – https://buy2cbonline.com/product/buy-clonazolam-powder-online/
Buy 2C-I powder online – https://buy2cbonline.com/product/2c-i-powder-for-sale-online-safely/
Buy Bromazolam powder online | Order Bromazolam online AUS | Bromazolam Price per gram https://buy2cbonline.com/product/buy-bromazolam-powder-online/
Buy 2CB powder online | Order 2CB powder online | 2CB price per gram Australia canada USA Europe- https://buy2cbonline.com/product/buy-2cb-powder-online/
Powdered DMT Buy, Order dmt online, DMT shop, Buy dmt online https://buy2cbonline.com/product/powdered-dmt-buy-online/
Buy Mephedrone online | Buy 4mmc online | Buy 4mmc Mephedrone Meow online | 4mmc Mephedrone price per gram | Where to buy Mephedrone 4mmc online ? https://buy2cbonline.com/product/buy-mephedrone-online-4mmc/
Buy Alprazolam powder online Order Alprazolam Powder Online | Alprazolam Powder Price per gram in Australia Buy Cheap Alprazolam Powder Online https://buy2cbonline.com/product/alprazolam-powder/
Buy protonitazene online | Order Protonitazene Online https://buy2cbonline.com/product/hydrochloride-protonitazene-for-sale/
Buy 3CMC crystal online Order 3CMC online | 3CMC price per gram |Buy Cheap 3CMC online| https://buy2cbonline.com/product/buy-3cmc-crystal-3-cmc-online/
Order eutylone online , eutylone crystal for sale, best price eutylone, eutylone supplier, order eutylone Europe, buy eutylone online eu uae usa https://buy2cbonline.com/product/eutylone-eutylone-crystal/
Buy 5cladba 5cl online | Order 5cladba 5cl Online in Australia – https://buy2cbonline.com/product/buy-5cladba-safely-online/ Buy Alprazolam Powder Online|Order Alprazolam Powder Online | Alprazolam Powder price per kg Apvp @buy2cbonline.com
Threema: 3F3YDZMD
Telegram: @DHlabo
https://t.me/MdphpFreebaseEurope
WhatsApp: +44 7507412275
https://unsplash.com/buy2cbonline https://www.credly.com/users/buy2cbonline https://findaspring.org/members/buy2cbonline/ https://www.atlasobscura.com/users/buy2cbonline https://sketchfab.com/buy2cbonline http://buy2cbonline.guildwork.com/forum https://www.discogs.com/user/buy2cbonline https://buy2cbonline.portfoliobox.net/ https://www.authorea.com/users/995327-buy2cbonline https://dribbble.com/buy2cbonline https://triberr.com/buy2cbonline https://knoji.com/meet/Buy2cbonline_com/ https://www.bookcrossing.com/mybookshelf/buy2cbonline/ https://experiment.com/users/buy2cbonline https://qiita.com/Buy2cbonline https://www.awwwards.com/buy2cbonline/ https://imageevent.com/buy2cbonline https://www.archilovers.com/buy2cbonline-com/ https://www.designnominees.com/profile/buy2cbonline https://buy2cbonline-online-shop.webflow.io/ https://listography.com/buy2cbonline https://www.ranker.com/writer/buy2cbonline https://www.mioola.com/Buy2cbonline_com https://www.writerscafe.org/buy2cbonline https://www.thetoptens.com/m/Buy2cbonline/ https://www.pinterest.com/buy2cbonline_com/ https://chatroll.com/profile/Buy2cbonline https://www.answers.com/u/buy2cbonline https://www.artwanted.com/Buy2cbonline https://www.threadless.com/Buy2cbonline
https://reactormag.com/members/buy2cbonline/
https://vimeo.com/buy2cbonline
https://www.buzzfeed.com/buy2cbonline
https://www.tumblr.com/buy2cbonline
https://www.tumblr.com/blog/buy2cbonline
https://www.meneame.net/user/Buy2cbonline
https://www.codechef.com/users/buy2cbonline
https://www.hotfrog.com/company/76e549e0dbb0c258a6aa3e6f75b128f5/buy2cbonline-com-online-shop/san-diego/training-programs
https://teletype.in/buy2cbonline.com https://hackaday.io/Buy2cbonline https://buy2cbonline.newgrounds.com/ https://www.jamendo.com/user/9372619/buy2cbonline-com https://web.archive.org/web/20250813025624/https://buy2cbonline.com/ https://archive.org/details/buy2cbonline/web-archive
https://www.gaiaonline.com/profiles/buy2cbonline/
https://trakt.tv/users/buy2cbonline
https://www.fanfiction.net/~buy2cbonline
https://www.quotev.com/buy2cbonline
https://buymeacoffee.com/buy2cbonline.com
https://kahkaham.net/Buy2cbonline
https://talkmarkets.com/member/Buy2cbonline/
https://www.techdirt.com/user/buy2cbonline/
https://www.merchantcircle.com/buy2cbonline-san-diego-ca
https://theomnibuzz.com/buy2cbonline-com-online-shop
https://wakelet.com/wake/eCwpeN-kIw9GIt0ohStn5
https://www.adclassified.in/user/profile/Buy2cbonlinecom
https://www.younow.com/buy2cbonline
https://sfidabiznesi.com/komuniteti/u/buy2cbonline/
https://www.autobox.al/buy2cbonline/
https://monkeydust.xobor.de/
https://buy2cbonline.forumieren.de/
https://www.elektroda.pl/rtvforum/uzytkownik4986785.html
https://www.flickr.com/photos/buy2cbonline/
heylink.me/buy2cbonline
https://245200410.hs-sites-na2.com/buy2cbonline.com-online-shop
https://tally.so/r/448Q6O
https://buy2cbonline-com.imexbb.com/
https://groups.google.com/g/buy2cbonline-online-shop
https://about.me/buy2cbonline.com/
https://app.daily.dev/buy2cbonline
https://challonge.com/users/buy2cbonline
https://scrapbox.io/stream/buy2cbonline/
https://dojour.us/e/76065-buy2cbonlinecom-shop
https://hackmd.io/buy2cbonline https://hackmd.io/buy2cbonline/S18oQE5O-g
https://pastelink.net/xqk9ty6b
https://pastelink.net/w4r50qng
https://tempel.in/view/p31LeF
https://buy2cbonline.linkspot.bio/
https://etextpad.com/dugkdwxjrh
https://skpaste.com/NpW7OTr
https://www.pastery.net/hxeqqn/
https://www.gemtracks.com/buy2cbonline/
https://www.are.na/buy2cbonline-com/buy2cbonline-com-shop
https://www.passes.com/dhresearchlabo
https://buy2cbonline.prezo.site/buy2cbonlinecom-shop—76362909-84db-4895-bb1a-253c285687a2
https://www.ecopreservationsociety.com/buy2cbonline
https://www.eventeny.com/company/buy2cbonline/
https://shilngie.com/profile/buy2cbonline
Michael Davenport
I was recently scammed out of $53,000 by a fraudulent Bitcoin investment scheme, which added significant stress to my already difficult health issues, as I was also facing cancer surgery expenses. Desperate to recover my funds, I spent hours researching and consulting other victims, which led me to discover the excellent reputation of Capital Crypto Recover, I came across a Google post It was only after spending many hours researching and asking other victims for advice that I discovered Capital Crypto Recovery’s stellar reputation. I decided to contact them because of their successful recovery record and encouraging client testimonials. I had no idea that this would be the pivotal moment in my fight against cryptocurrency theft. Thanks to their expert team, I was able to recover my lost cryptocurrency back. The process was intricate, but Capital Crypto Recovery’s commitment to utilizing the latest technology ensured a successful outcome. I highly recommend their services to anyone who has fallen victim to cryptocurrency fraud. For assistance contact Recoverycapital@fastservice.com and on Telegram OR Call Number +1 (336)390-6684 via email: Capitalcryptorecover@zohomail.com you can visit his website: https://recovercapital.wixsite.com/capital-crypto-rec-1
josephine
Dr. Ogbo spell cast a lasting impact, and I’m forever grateful for his help in saving my marriage. His compassion, understanding, and professionalism made the entire process smooth and effective. I’m living proof that Dr. Ogbo spells work. If you’re facing marital problems or struggling to reconnect with your partner, I highly recommend seeking his help. He genuinely cares about his clients and will stop at nothing to ensure their happiness. Thank you, Dr. Ogbo, for changing my life and bringing my husband back to me.
Eliot Sanchez
FINALLY FREE FROM HERPES VIRUS
I thought my life had nothing to offer anymore because life became meaningless to me because I had HERPES VIRUS, the symptoms became very severe and bold and made my family run from and abandon me so they won’t get infected. I gave up everything, my hope, dreams,vision and job because the doctor told me there’s no cure. I consumed so many drugs but they never cured me but hid the symptoms inside me making it worse. I was doing some research online someday when I came across testimonies of some people of how Dr.Akhimien cured them from HERPES VIRUS, I never believed at first and thought it was a joke but later decided to contact him on the details provided and when I messaged him we talked and he sent me his herbal medicine and told me to go for a test after two weeks. Within 9 days of medication the symptoms disappeared and when I went for a test Lo and behold I was NEGATIVE by the Doctor Who tested me earlier. Thank you Dr.Akhimien because I forever owe you my life and I’ll keep on telling the world about you. If you are going through same situation worry no more and contact DR Akhimien via website: https://drakhiniemodion.wixsite.com/drakhimien
or email: drakhiniemodion@gmail.com ,his
WhatsApp him via +2349133157031