The best science jokes to make you laugh, groan, and Google
Crafting a perfect joke takes skill, timing, nuance, and a sophisticated understanding of your audience. The following list of science-based knee slappers has almost one of those. We gathered up some of the most groan-inducing scientific jokes we’ve heard from peers, remember from childhood, or made up while we were supposed to be partaking in serious journalism. So, when the family gathering turns to a tense topic this holiday season, tell one of these room-clearing jokes to lighten the mood.
Have a favorite science joke that’s not on the list? Tweet it with the hashtag #PopSciJokes for a chance to get it on the list.
What did one beam of light say to the other just before they slammed into each other? “Dude, you can totally crash on my photon.”
An amoeba sits down to eat at a restaurant. Across the room, another Amoeba is undergoing mitosis. The first amoeba flags down the waiter and says, “I’ll have what she’s halving.”
Want to hear a joke about potassium? K.
Two chemists walk into a bar.
The first one says, “I’ll have some H2O.”
The second says, “I’ll have some water too. But why’d you order it like that? We aren’t at work.”
The first chemist excuses himself and weeps in the bathroom.
His assassination plot had failed.
A photon checks into a hotel, and the desk clerk says "Can I get a bellhop for your bags?" Photon responds "No need. I'm traveling light."
Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana.
Why can’t you trust atoms?
They make up everything.
All mushrooms are edible. Some are only edible once.
Why can’t you argue with Pi?
It’s irrational.
There are 10 kinds of people: Those who understand binary and those who don’t.
I was reading a book on helium.
I couldn’t put it down.
There are only bad science jokes left. All the good ones argon.
What did the stamen say to the pistil?
I like your style!
What did the microbiology student get for being late to class?
A tardigrade.
How much room do fungi need to grow?
As mushroom as possible.
Does anyone have any jokes about Sodium?
Na.
If you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the precipitate
Why do chemists love dubstep music?
They love to drop the base.
A butterfly gets pulled over by the cops for speeding. He hands the cop his driver’s license with a photo of a caterpillar on it. “Sorry, it’s an old picture.”
What do you call it when a geologist has to work on a Friday night?
Gin and tectonics
Written by PopSci Staff for Popular Science and legally licensed through the Matcha publisher network. Please direct all licensing questions to legal@getmatcha.com.
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Ozempic is a brand-name version of the generic medication semaglutide, which is a type of medication called a glucagon-like peptide 1 receptor agonist. Instead of that tongue-twister of a name, we call these medications “GLP-1s” for short.
Ozempic is FDA-approved for the management of certain symptoms and risks of type 2 diabetes.
How does Ozempic work?
Ozempic works by slowing the digestion process, which can help you to feel full for longer. Ozempic, like other GLP-1 receptor agonists, acts like a hormone your body naturally makes to regulate blood sugar and may help support weight loss.
Do you prescribe Ozempic for weight loss?
Ozempic is not FDA-approved for weight loss. Ro-affiliated healthcare professionals have the discretion to prescribe a medication off-label if they believe it is an appropriate course of treatment for a particular patient.
How can Ozempic help with weight loss? It acts like a natural hormone your body uses to regulate blood sugar and appetite—key steps in resetting your biological set point to help you maintain a new, lower weight.
See if Ozempic is right for you here.
What is Ozempic’s dosing?
Ozempic dosing starts out low, then gradually increases over the first few months until a steady dose is reached. If prescribed, your Ro-affiliated provider will work with you to find the schedule and dosing that’s right for you. As an example, the lowest dose of Ozempic is 0.25 mg once a week and the maximum dose is 2.0 mg once a week.
How do you take Ozempic?
Ozempic comes in a prefilled injection pen that contains multiple doses. If prescribed, you (or someone in your household) will select the prescribed dose, then administer the injection under the skin of your stomach, thigh, or arm once a week.
While a routine injection may sound intimidating, the Ozempic pen uses a tiny needle designed to minimize discomfort. You’ll also receive clear instructions on using the injection pen, and your Ro-affiliated provider can offer additional advice.
Will my insurance cover the cost of Ozempic?
The cost of your Ozempic medication can range depending on your insurance coverage—and we’re here to help with that!
Ro’s insurance concierge will work with your insurance provider to help with the process of determining coverage for your GLP-1 medication, which is paid for separately from your Ro Body membership. Ro does not accept insurance for the Ro Body membership, which is cash pay only and does not accept insurance.
Currently, Ro can’t help coordinate coverage for GLP-1 medications for government insurance plans — but depending on your plan, you may still be able to pay out of pocket for certain cash-pay medication options. If you have Federal Employee Health Benefits Program (FEHB), you can join the Ro Body membership and access our insurance concierge.
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Ozempic is a brand-name version of the generic medication semaglutide, which is a type of medication called a glucagon-like peptide 1 receptor agonist. Instead of that tongue-twister of a name, we call these medications “GLP-1s” for short.
Ozempic is FDA-approved for the management of certain symptoms and risks of type 2 diabetes.
How does Ozempic work?
Ozempic works by slowing the digestion process, which can help you to feel full for longer. Ozempic, like other GLP-1 receptor agonists, acts like a hormone your body naturally makes to regulate blood sugar and may help support weight loss.
Do you prescribe Ozempic for weight loss?
Ozempic is not FDA-approved for weight loss. Ro-affiliated healthcare professionals have the discretion to prescribe a medication off-label if they believe it is an appropriate course of treatment for a particular patient.
How can Ozempic help with weight loss? It acts like a natural hormone your body uses to regulate blood sugar and appetite—key steps in resetting your biological set point to help you maintain a new, lower weight.
See if Ozempic is right for you here.
What is Ozempic’s dosing?
Ozempic dosing starts out low, then gradually increases over the first few months until a steady dose is reached. If prescribed, your Ro-affiliated provider will work with you to find the schedule and dosing that’s right for you. As an example, the lowest dose of Ozempic is 0.25 mg once a week and the maximum dose is 2.0 mg once a week.
How do you take Ozempic?
Ozempic comes in a prefilled injection pen that contains multiple doses. If prescribed, you (or someone in your household) will select the prescribed dose, then administer the injection under the skin of your stomach, thigh, or arm once a week.
While a routine injection may sound intimidating, the Ozempic pen uses a tiny needle designed to minimize discomfort. You’ll also receive clear instructions on using the injection pen, and your Ro-affiliated provider can offer additional advice.
Will my insurance cover the cost of Ozempic?
The cost of your Ozempic medication can range depending on your insurance coverage—and we’re here to help with that!
Ro’s insurance concierge will work with your insurance provider to help with the process of determining coverage for your GLP-1 medication, which is paid for separately from your Ro Body membership. Ro does not accept insurance for the Ro Body membership, which is cash pay only and does not accept insurance.
Currently, Ro can’t help coordinate coverage for GLP-1 medications for government insurance plans — but depending on your plan, you may still be able to pay out of pocket for certain cash-pay medication options. If you have Federal Employee Health Benefits Program (FEHB), you can join the Ro Body membership and access our insurance concierge.
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